Nope, I'm definitely a ditherer. Real indecisive Libran.

I could never give anyone any orders because I can never think of any.

Which is why I have almost always worked by myself in small second hand bookshops. Where I can waffle away with the customers, but do my own thing. I did once, for about five years, work in an office at ICI with nine other women. I loved it. It was great fun. Although I admit I enjoyed the social life more than the actual work.

I just asked OH what he thought. He said, 'Pen, you're like a coiled spring' but he was being very sarcastic.....and laughing, so I know he meant the opposite.

Penelope wrote:

Nope, I'm definitely a ditherer. Real indecisive Libran.

I could never give anyone any orders because I can never think of any.

Who says I have to give orders, much less make any decisions -- I can't make a decision to save my life, Penelope -- in order to express my bossy Libran side?

The place where I work is a collective, so all policies and new decisions are based on staff consensus; we are survivor-centered, empowerment model, so I don't have to make any real decisions in doing direct service, either. What I have to do that engages my stealth-boss qualities is to get all the after hours crisis line shifts and tabling hours and so forth covered by volunteers who can and will do the job; and I work with volunteers so that they understand how not to be bossy, or oppressive or re-traumatizing, or rescuing, but rather to support, offer information on options, give validation, believe, and affirm. Neither I nor the volunteers can be bossy, yet I have to model this and enforce it so they truly won't be.

It is a very subtle kind of bossiness, not always easy, but that's what's fun about it. You have to make it seem really cool and intrinsically satisfying to do what you're doing so that people will take hours of training and do it for free and feel good about it. This is no mere use of force we are discussing. This is a fine art of delicate bossiness. It's very satisfying. Kind of like being a dominatrix because it is led by the person you're "dominating." You just have to understand what they want and what their limits are and go from there.

Sorry, I am reading it, I just get so busy some times. Plus I have been trying to keep up with all the books that we are working on. It is fun, but a challenge. I have to admit I have made it farther on The Name of the Rose so far but I am reading dorian grey also.

Penelope wrote:Or ditherers like me and Oscar. I think I imagine him to be a ditherer, because I mix him up with Stephen Fry.
Which are you?

You are right. He does look alot like Stephen Fry. And they are both gay.
Don't feel too bad about the company you keep on your birthday. I share a birthday with Timothy Leary.

Trish said:

I share a birthday with Timothy Leary.

Oh God, I'm sorry Trish....we'll try not to hold it against you.

Really, this sums up this whole forum. We can't help who'se born on the same birthday as us. We can't help into which culture, society, mind-set we're born....it is bound to influence us.

We can only talk to one another and try to understand.

Speaking of Stephen Fry... I saw a HIV/AIDS documentary he did on cable once a while ago. I have to say up until that point I haven't seen much of his work before that thought I really loved the way he did the documentary series. He was a very thoughtful "every man" while exploring difficult subject matter. I haven't really seen anything else by him on American TV since. I understand he is much more well known in your neck of the woods, Penelope. It reminds me of a Bill Maher monologue: "[Europe] has public intellectuals. We have Dr. Phil."

Stephen Fry:

I liked him in the film - Peter's Friends.

I like him because he feels inadequate, although he is highly intelligent, and he is famous.....but he blames himself because he is famous for something so trivial.

I like him because he is a gentle and caring soul. But most of all, I like him because he makes me laugh.....at myself.

I suppose that is the 'everyman' syndrome.