It might be time to trot out the jokes. There is a slim book by Milhail Horowitz, published by City Lights Press in 1978 (and doubtless out of print), called "Big League Poets." This is a book which should be a cult classic but probably isn't. As you have already imagined, the conceit here is our great world poets as baseball players. The illustrations are just as good (or as painfully bad) as the blurbs given to Homer, Chaucer, Shakespeare, Dante, and many others. Our man of the hour is of course featured. J.M. is pictured at the top of his wind-up and is wearing a "Browns" jersey. His caption reads:

"As every schoolboy doubtless knows, LONG JOHN MILTON pitched for Paradise, and Paradise Lost."

First, before I tell my joke -- I have to say I laugh (knowing what DWill actually looks like) each time I see the picture of Walt next to his moniker, DWill. Now my contribution -- just a small ha ha.

John Milton wrote Paradise Lost. Then his wife died and he wrote Paradise Regained.

Okay, you can boo if you need to.

No, that's a good one