It sounds like an upsetting situation for everyone involved, Tom. I'm sorry you're having to struggle with it.I could use a Mary now as I am now dealing with (I believe) a case of the hysterics:
Quote:
I don't know and I don't care," said the nurse. "Hysterics and temper are half what ails him."
A hypochondriacal aunt has laid down to die, and I don't see any way to get her up.
Are you sure you want a Mary like the one in the book, though? Didn't she scream abuse at Colin and even slap or threaten to slap him or something? Surely your poor aunt is not to be treated like that! I'm glad you haven't got a Mary to "get her up!"
The element in the story that seems applicable is the notion that when sunlight, fresh air, love, beauty, and the opportunity to contribute to and share in life are introduced, people sometimes feel more like living, healing, growing strong...or at least they have a nicer, more loving and comfortable environment around them in their last days. In other words, bringing some life, love, beauty and interest into an ailing person's life couldn't hurt, whether she's "hysterical" (not one of my favorite words due to its anti-feminist history) or actually preparing to die (always a real possibility with the elderly, even when they seem otherwise hale and hearty).
I am very grateful that I was able to see the tender, loving care my mother gave to her mother in the last year or so of her life. There was this beautiful sense of a powerful connection of nurturance having come full circle. Has your aunt spent much of her life caring for others? Or was that an opportunity for growth and fulfillment she missed? Some kinds of service to others or care for others can turn out to be the most valuable parts of a life. And sometimes it can be important for an older woman to take a break from it and learn how to receive. I have no idea whatsoever if any of this has anything to do with what's going on for your aunt. It's impossible to have any perspective from so far away, of course. There might be any number of things going on. Is she willing to talk about how she feels and what she believes is happening with the story of her life now? Does she have someone who listens? And do you and the other people in her support system have enough support and energy to care for yourselves and each other?