ant wrote:
On your "Trump Watch" why didn't you mentioned the loss of Trump's brother recently? Or did I miss it.
You comment enough on him and his character.. Why wouldn't you, as a Christian, offer condolences for his recent loss?
We have many, many differences on this little planet we live on, but at our deepest core we all hurt and grieve nearly the same as our friends and those we might very well dislike intensely.
Where's the empathy in your religion?
Has it somehow been justifiably washed away?
To state the obvious, you did not offer condolences yourself, at least, as far as I know.
I think you are trying to make a point about the Trump Watch theme, and I will just clarify that my reason for starting it is that Trump is intentionally threatening democracy, and lots of people are cozying up to that behind a smokescreen of deflection and outright lies. So I think it is a good idea to set out in a written record the repeated attacks. A lot of Republicans want to have it both ways - the racist white flight to the suburbs is a defense of decency and civilization, and being nice is for losers. That kind of incoherence, which has been known as "staying on message" for 20 years now, at least, thrives when nobody gets the facts out to take a look at them.
I think you have made an effort to offer the same scrutiny for Biden. He has certainly stood in the schoolhouse door himself, and failed women when push came to shove. If the Republican party was offering a decent alternative, like, say, McCain or Romney, I would give serious consideration to whether I thought they were less of a problem. But I would still come out for Biden, I suspect, because I do prefer empathy over "toughness" when it comes to making our laws and our policies. Biden is a politician, and he will win or lose as one, so he doesn't go for wild-eyed theory over pragmatic accommodation. But he has the heart to know that children not getting a good education is a tragedy no matter what color they are. And a mind unwarped by fear, clear enough to see that the future of our country requires that we face up to the tasks that are in front of us.
That said, let me address the point about condolences to Mr. Trump, because it's an interesting one. First, let me say I am learning, in a men's group mostly in their 70s and 80s, that I am not very good about condolences to strangers. I am still getting to know them, and can barely tell Skip from Ben, and they are facing the trials of old age together (which I will be in the middle of soon enough). So I devoutly pray that my tepid formalities do not sting, and that they take comfort from the heartfelt sympathy of the guys they have been friends with for 20, 30 and 40 years. If I am not living up to my social obligations, I am sorry about that, but I expect that what really matters in condolences is true accompaniment, the ability to feel some of the loss.
Trump's loss sort of takes that dynamic totally off the normal human scale. First of all, we know that he showed no sorrow or sympathy at the time of a previous brother's death, barely visiting in the hospital and effectively dusting the guy off his shoulders like so much dandruff. Now, I don't really want to get told about the private affairs of public figures, but that representation fits my experience with narcissists quite well. I believe he has suffered a real loss, but it seems he comes from a family in which loss is not something you let yourself be vulnerable enough to feel.
I feel a lot of pity for Trump, and even a certain amount of empathy. But it isn't for the ordinary sorrows that we all face, since loving someone means being hurt when they die. I feel sorry for the guy every day, for having to live in his skin. Having to avoid his failings by trying to prop up a fantasy version of himself, every day and every hour. We all have failings. Some of us still haven't figured out that being human is a worthy thing in itself, and that the pain that life brings is not made any lighter by putting up a front of invulnerability.
What does make it lighter is company. I hope Trump has somebody he can let down his guard with, and share his sorrow with. That somebody is certainly not me. Would my condolences make any difference, on the weird off chance that they came to his attention? I seriously doubt it.