I am reading a collection of short stories. The author, when describing action, does not finish his sentences. It is very annoying.

Wrong spelling of simple words.

Brooks, how does the author end the sentence? With an ellipsis...

Several things put me off. Whatever they are, they break the mood. In prose, starting a sentence with an adverb in no way conveys the quality of the subject. Incorrect assumptions made about technical details which show the author's lack of research are all too common.

Not giving it the ending I was hoping for! But then, they would be very predictable if they always had a happy ending.

When, in setting forth dialogue, the author constantly repeats 'he said' or 'she said'. Don't these people know you can show speech in other ways; "he responded," "she replied," or even... she stared at him with cold eye. "And?"

Cattleman wrote:When, in setting forth dialogue, the author constantly repeats 'he said' or 'she said'. Don't these people know you can show speech in other ways; "he responded," "she replied," or even... she stared at him with cold eye. "And?"

I agree. It seems to me that a passage of dialogue can also dispense with these indications occasionally, if the context of what is said implies who said it. If done carefully and not too often, I think the passage flows more easily.

I agree with you TD. This why a writer needs to write and read on a regular basis. I still have to work on tags when I write. It's easy to get into the “said” trap.

Steinbeck was a genius when it came to tags. The Moon is Down is a good reference to keep around.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Moon_Is_Down

Brooks127 wrote:I agree with you TD. This why a writer needs to write and read on a regular basis. I still have to work on tags when I write. It's easy to get into the “said” trap.

Steinbeck was a genius when it came to tags. The Moon is Down is a good reference to keep around.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Moon_Is_Down

The Moon is Down is actually a perfect example of things a writer does that annoy me, and a favorite writer to boot. It is very preachy. It has a clear message that the writer had expressly written the novel around, and that he throws at you at every opportunity. Of course, we all agree with the message (Nazism is wrong), but it is very obvious and lacking any subtlety. You don't need a book for that. The (wooden) characters, the plot, the descriptions; all seem to be slapped together just to get the message out. It's rare that Steinbeck annoys me, but here he had outdone himself.

Rita McBride wrote:The Moon is Down is actually a perfect example of things a writer does that annoy me, and a favorite writer to boot. It is very preachy. It has a clear message that the writer had expressly written the novel around,

You are correct. It is preachy, but at least a person can get the morality without having to take a college course. I am completely perplexed by how many people do not understand the morality behind Plato's, "Allegory of the Cave," and thus require the advice of a trained professional. If only they knew...

To be blunt, we need more writers who say it like it is. I wrote a very preachy story titled, “Just Follow the Procedure.” The story is a about a guy who works a job, does exactly what he is told, and finds out in the end he has made a terrible mistake by never asking any questions. You can listen to the audio of it on my website. http://www.brookskohler.com/audio-stories.html