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Control.

#55: Oct. - Nov. 2008 (Fiction)
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Ophelia

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Control.

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Is Lolita all about exercising control?

Chapter 18, about Humbert's second wife, Charlotte:
Bland American Charlotte frightened me. My lighthearted dream of controlling her through her passion for me was all wrong.
By "wrong" he means that it's not going to work.
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Ophelia

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Ch 28, the (repeated ) use of the image of the key at the motel firmly establishes control, as well as outlining Lolita's prison.

Before their first sexual encounter, Humbert leaves her to sleep (he provided the drug!), and leaves the hotel room for a few hours, but he makes sure that he locks her in.
p 141 (Penguin Edition):

"And she was mine, she was mine, the key was in my fist, the fist was in my pocket, she was mine."
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I won't even lie. I have not gotten that far. However, from reading the quotes it sounds like Humbert wants control but on his terms. Control seems to be key in this book. Who has it? Who is giving it up? Who truly has it?
If you obey all of the rules, you miss all of the fun.
--Katherine Hepburn
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Humbert want to possess Lolita. His desires have the control and he will do anything just to be able to have Lolita, at times unhappy with himself, loathing himself, other times ecstatic that he has her and can hold her. Lolita's learns that she has a little power and can trade sexual favors for gifts, or she can punish by withholding them.

Humbert knows his power over her will weaken and his fear of losing her causes him grief and paranoia which erodes his power further.
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Ophelia

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Part II, chapter 7, gives us the details of their money arrangements.

However awful the topic, it is impossible not to feel admiration for the style here, the crazy humour, and at times the sophistication.
O reader! Laugh not, as you imagine me, on the very rack of joy noisily emitting dimes and quarters, and great big silver dollars like some sonorous, jingly and wholly demented machine vomiting riches
Then, something else I had forgotten about: Humbert steals back most of the money from Dolores afterwards.

So, while he insists so much on the money she demands, she is presented as having control over him to some extent. But as he is being particularly careful that she never has enough money to leave, he is the one who mostly controls the situation.
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I have a little bit of a problem understanding why HH gave her the drug, if he was all about control would he have either manipulated her emotions into agreeing with it or just taken it? He seems to only get sexually involved with her when she allows him to.
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Re: Control.

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I have one more view on the relationship between Delores and Humbert. First, Lo was looking for a father figure to fill the void since her own father's untimely death. Young females from dysfuctional homes without a father figure in addition to a cold and hostile relationship with their mother often act out in ways that appear flirtatious. What that meant for Lo was entirely different that what it meant to someone like Humbert. Second, he proves himself to be a habitual liar.

How do we know he is ever telling the truth? Or could it be he is telling his truth, his version of the events as they happened in his sick mind. All during the time they spent together at Lawn Street he was grooming little Lo. Typical of what men like him do to their victims. Also, let us not forget how he tried to drug her so he could get to her without her knowing.

If we interpret what Nabokov describes the following day, we find Lo depressed and uncomfortable while Humbert is driving the car. She begins to complain of pain. She can no longer sit...he had torn something inside her. She needs a washroom. This proves she was still a virgin. Does that sound like she was experienced and had consensual sex or rather he drugged her and took total control/advantage of an orphan of twelve, standing 4' 10" weighing 78lbs.

If she were so willing than why did he have to continually threaten her with detention homes or becoming a ward of the state/jail? As well as many other threats. She sobbed every night, every night he feigned sleep. Control.
This was a lone child who was abused by a panting maniac until she found a way to escape the horrors that Humbert inflicted upon her. Unfortunately, she fell into a worse situation which so often happens in these cases.
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